There
are elements of risk in skiing that common sense and personal awareness
can help reduce.
Ski under control and in such a manner
you can stop or avoid other skiers or objects.
When skiing downhill or overtaking
another skier, you must avoid the skier below you.
You must not stop where you obstruct a
trail or are not visible from above.
When entering a trail or starting
downhill, yield to other skiers.
All skiers shall use devices to help
prevent runaway skis.
You shall keep off closed trails and
posted areas and observe all posted signs.
THIS IS A PARTIAL LIST. BE
SAFETY CONSCIOUS!
How to
Prepare for the Ski Season (this is funny)
Visit your local butcher and pay $30 to
sit in the walk-in freezer for half an hour. Afterwards, burn two $50
dollar bills to warm up.
Go to the nearest hockey rink and walk
across the ice 20 times in your ski boots carrying two pairs of skis,
accessory bag and poles. Pretend you are looking for your car.
For ski boot simulation at home, put a
pebble in your street shoes and tighten a C-clamp around your toes.
Buy a pair of gloves and immediately
throw one away.
Go to McDonald's and insist on paying
$6.50 for a hamburger. Be sure to wait in the longest line.
Clip a lift ticket to the zipper of your
jacket and ride a motorcycle fast enough to make the ticket lacerate
your face.
Drive slowly for five hours - anywhere -
as long as it's in a snowstorm and your following an 18 wheeler.
Fill a blender with ice, hit the pause
button and let the spray blast in your face. You'd almost believe
you're skiing in front of a snowmaker.
Dress up in as many clothes as you can
and then proceed to take them off because you have to go to the
bathroom.
Repeat all of the above every Saturday
and Sunday.
